deja vu -- like, taking me back to high school!

I spent the wee hours of Saturday morning making out with a kid I only know by his first name. By wee hours, I mean the gap of time between 3am and 6am. Yeah, my lips hurt the next day a little bit...

I discovered today he is in his late 20s, which is way better than the barely-21 I thought he was. And it started over a drunken conversation about Russia invading Georgia. I remember -- through the haze -- thinking, I don't know what the hell he's saying, but he sure is smart! And suddenly I was drawn to him. I have a strong thing for smarties+cuties. Especially after a night of beer drinking.

During the whole operation, his hat came off several times and I remember I was startled to see his hair. I still haven't figured out why I had that reaction.

Overall, it was a heck of a lot of fun. I've text-messaged him a rematch challenge. He's in my phone as "_ _ _ _ _ from the party."

Just when you start to like humans

things like this show up. Two weeks until some kids do this. Or better yet, those crazy wives who kill their 1st and 2nd husbands but somehow don't get caught until the 3rd one.

New cloaking device could prevent pacemakers from being hacked

Go half on a baby?

OK, so here's the new plan. In two years I would like to have a child. I therefore: need to become a published author (so I can work from home), locate a physically attractive, mentally stable gay or platonic male friend who would like to have offspring and co-parent with me (I'm thinking a fairly successful carpenter or other self-employed type), upgrade my salary and buy a new house with enough bedrooms, and get healthy enough to be active while pregnant.

I figure what's the hassle of love worth? Waiting around to find out if someone cheated on you or if you're considering it yourself? Fighting over money and affection because someone owes it to the other? Nah. I have officially evolved. I can get love from my family and friends. I just need a partner. We can draw up an agreement about how we'll deal with disagreements... child custody, moving across the country, health insurance, holidays, all that can be planned in a non-emotional, civil manner and enforced by law.

Why complicate raising a balanced human being with the inherent whimsy of emotion? Especially one as mind-altering as romantic love...

So, what's the best way to find a partner candidate? Maybe I can rent a billboard. Or make a website called halfonababy.com. People can submit their photos and a little profile of themselves and what they are offering the new kid. What do I bring to the table? Introspection, unconditional love, ability to get things done, fun as hell and a fierceness only a mother could provide. The agreement would have to cover two kids, though. I totally believe in having a spare in case something happens to the first one (note the earthquake in China, and I'm getting too old to do-over).

I sort of feel better about the plan. Now I need to drill it into my head and the notion of being in love with an adult male person completely out the other side. Like, seriously.

Yup.

Wow. Just looked it up and yes, he does... Good health detective I am!

Hmmmm. Does that make it unfair that he has a health disorder that gives him an advantage in the pool? Long arms and hands???

Phelps

Do you think Michael Phelps has Marfan's syndrome?

D'oh!

I just found out my internet man is actually already taken. Ha. How, do you ask? The good old "my gf is looking at the phone bill, which incidentally, she pays for" routine. Hmmm. No, make that "I'm looking at my bf's phone bill to see who he called while I was away". As in she called me. And hung up. Somehow I just knew and a couple text messages later, all is revealed.

Silly me for believing in romance. I'm trying to beat that out of me and someday I will be successful at it. Successfully bitter and angry.

Home sweet SUV

I got my car back today and boy, what a difference. I feel like I'm sitting up on one of those little bed-looking things atop an elephant. It handles well, though, and I'm always amazed at what my wheels look like without all the brake dust.

America's Best Dance Crew

Fanny Pak was ROBBED. Straight JACKED. Seriously. I am not watching this show any more.

Somehow, ANDC ended up with the same lame carbon copy of the last season's groups. Not to say those people aren't talented, but Fanny Pak (despite the questionable name) was more creative, did waaaaay better routine than their competition and face it, made you want to watch. So much for that.

Hope they book a lot of jobs. They're awesome.

Fear.

I am afraid of my resume. It's like anything else I've built up in my head that is super-important... marriage, sleep, paying bills on time... I take it so seriously I can not bring myself to face it.

Mediocrity rules!

I'm wondering why everyone stresses being "the best" when everyone knows that's pretty much impossible. Me included. It's almost hardwired in me that every breath I take should be toward being better than most other people. In actuality, I should be working toward being happy, even if that means I am less than most people. And by less, I mean, make less money, be less smart, be less attractive, less thoughtful, less "successful". Seriously, how many "successful" people can say they're happy? And if they were, they'd slow down and let some other people catch up, wouldn't they? You can't stay on top forever, even if you're Bill Gates or Oprah.

So, should it be ok to be "average"? What's wrong with that? Of course, being average and unhappy just means you're a loser, but if you manage to be happy with what you have, do you lose your American Society Citizen card?

Gender. Curious?

Damn, so much catching up to do with this blog thing.

Synopsis:

Still consistently single and nearly addicted to trans- shows on Discovery Health, I've weathered a couple scary lightning storms, researched DJ Drama, heard that G Love AND John Mayer are in concert TOGETHER, hate my new doctor and am trying to wean off my obsession with Drumsticks Triple Chocolate Supreme Sundae cones. The last cashier to check me out at Publix even made a comment. I had two boxes and basically $42 worth of sugar products.

The suave Dutch guy I had a date with apparently "no likey". I took it hard only because of the context that is my singlehood. After dreaming up ways to not die alone (which all ended in me dying alone) I somehow got on the upswing.

But yeah, about the trans- thing. I think transgendered people are fascinating. What the hell kind of personal inner strength does it take to ditch your gender and do the opposite one? And then go on tv and tell everyone about it...

Catch the wave...


http://www.buckangel.com/
Yep. used to be a woman. Kinda still is in some ways.

http://www.lorencameron.com/
Fascinating.

http://abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=3088298
I have no words. This kid's a leader.

http://www.bbcamerica.com/content/318/index.jsp
I can almost see this dude being born a girl. But only with his shirt off.

If you click around in those links, you will no doubt be googling a lot more. No worries -- it doesn't mean you're gay or questioning your gender.

Promoe, Drama

In the battle of the white rappers, my new favorite is a swedish dred-locked dude named promoe. He's part of some larger group that starts with an l... too lazy to google it, but they're pretty good. Even though his sound is a little bouncy -- in that way that's so fun when you're in a good mood but seems a little cloying when you're normal -- I like it. "These Walls Don't Lie" is cool. And it's in English, so mo betta. Least I think it is.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Promoe

Swedish actually sounds like some crazy bootleg mix of Spanglish and slang. Like you can almost make out what they're saying, but through some scramble of the nerve endings, can't decipher a damn word. If you don't believe me, check this out: http://www.myspace.com/afasifilthy . You have to listen a while to get to the lyrical bit, but it's worth it in my opinion.

I hadn't seen this before my friend sent it to me. I laughed so hard I cried, and then I sent it to people I know watch Project Runway -- which is what any e-responsible person does...

Folding into the car

i have one more night with the Z4. It's grown on me, I have to admit. I feel a little exotic in this big, black penis of a car, even though unless the door is open wide I can't slide my feet inside. i got to gun it on the highway last night and it felt good switching lanes and knowing i was about 6 inches off the ground.

Until today. Flash rainstorm made me pull it over and wait in a parking lot because I could see NOTHING. And when another car drove alongside me, basically all the water they kicked up was like a curtain over my windshield. Oh well, my car's done anyway, all good things must come to an end.

Backwards kids up in the air

Just heard that Txas may have to give back the scads of kids they took from the polygamist compound under suspicion of "child abuse". I have complicated feelings about that whole situation. Do I think it's right to marry off pre-teen girls in this day and age? No, of course not. And I am vehemently against any form of child abuse, for sure. But removing all the children from a community, regardless of age, risk of danger and trauma caused the kids who haven't been victimized is a strange call to have made. The government response struck me as a modern Pied Piper. Remember, he was that vindictive creepy guy who didn't get paid for his services so marched all the kids away instead. I feel like the state of Texas decided to take all those kids because that community flagrantly bent the law by being "married" to more than one woman.

And speaking of marriage. I am confused. I thought marriage was all about being legal. That's what gays are fighting for, after all, a legitimate, legally-protective, LEGAL union called "marriage". So, these polygamists who marry one wife and either never legally marry the subsequent wives, or divorce the previous wife before marrying the next (and staying with both) aren't actually breaking the law, then, right? It's more like having more than one baby-mama, and everyone just getting along. If that's not legal, I know a few neighborhoods that should be on the list of targets...

But back to the kids thing. I was a foster parent for 2 years of my early 20s. I made a difference, I was the best foster mom I could be. There was not a moment I didn't realize the pain of the kids in my care. After all, they didn't belong with me. They belonged somewhere else. Potentially screwing up some 4 year old's life by injecting fear of abandonment is not protecting that child. Many kids of divorce live that life every day and it's a tough monkey to get off your back. What does a kid have if they can't trust that there will be a continuing thread through their childhood: parental love, a place they belong. These Texas kids probably felt like they'd been dropped onto another planet.

I'm glad the supreme court is making the local government justify what they did. Any child in danger should be removed. But we should be careful that we aren't condoning removal of kids because they're parents value things different from us. That borders on criminal in itself. More on this later.

Meat 2.0

Someone at lunch today reminded me that someone in the world is engineering meat and concepted a product sure to impact the hunger rate in some societies -- the Meat Sheet. Other names include Pseudoflesh, which has an appetizing ring to it.

http://www.technovelgy.com/ct/Science-Fiction-News.asp?NewsNum=414

First of all, let me say that my stomach flinches a tad whenever I hear this referred to. It is nice and humane and protects animals from being butchered, but I just can''t get my mind around it. Culturing cells to create muscle we can consume? All without the benefit of actual "life"? I cant decide if that is good, bad or scary. Maybe all three. Will I eat it? HELL no. Will this change vegetarians' mind set? I have absolutely no idea.

Slugging it out

Wow. I heard the coolest story on NPR this morning. In at least a few US cities, people have taken a creative but oh so simple approach to mass-ish transit. Apparently, people line up in parking lots and decks and wait for solo drivers dying to angle into the HOV lane to come by. There's a person in the front who calls out the driver's destination, then the willing passengers queue up and climb in. It's like impromptu carpooling. It's called Slugging. The passengers are the Slugs.

The funniest aspect of this whole thing is that there are rules of Slug etiquette. You're not supposed to talk. Names are not exchanged. You can't use your cellphone except for the briefest of exchanges. One guy interviewed said he hadn't given as much as his name in over five years of Slugging it out. Another Slug shared that his commute is longer, but it's free -- since another rule is the Driver does not get gas money.

There is a lot right about this. It's definitely interesting, along the lines of hiring people out of the Home Depot parking lot to help with your yard on a Saturday.

More rules here: http://www.slug-lines.com/Slugging/Etiquette.asp

adidas

So, I was showing off to an online friend last night by mentioning that adidas was actually the founder's name and he replied "Nazi". For a second I was chalking the remark up to the fact that he was german, but imagine my surprise when I googled and found out Adolf Dassler was in fact a Nazi. He may have made up for it by making shoes for Olympian Jesse Owens, but still. Wow. Remember when you thought adidas stood for All Day I Dream About Sex?

god's gate

Saw a license plate that read "GODISG8". Wouldn't it have been better to try "GODSGR8", or if that was taken to just try something else? Maybe "WWGD" or "GR8GOD"? As it is, it may be interpreted as Goddess Gate, which makes absolutely no sense to me.

I also always see a license plate at the office deck that says "6FTBEWTY" or something like that, since we only get 7 characters. I still haven't seen the driver.