Go half on a baby?

OK, so here's the new plan. In two years I would like to have a child. I therefore: need to become a published author (so I can work from home), locate a physically attractive, mentally stable gay or platonic male friend who would like to have offspring and co-parent with me (I'm thinking a fairly successful carpenter or other self-employed type), upgrade my salary and buy a new house with enough bedrooms, and get healthy enough to be active while pregnant.

I figure what's the hassle of love worth? Waiting around to find out if someone cheated on you or if you're considering it yourself? Fighting over money and affection because someone owes it to the other? Nah. I have officially evolved. I can get love from my family and friends. I just need a partner. We can draw up an agreement about how we'll deal with disagreements... child custody, moving across the country, health insurance, holidays, all that can be planned in a non-emotional, civil manner and enforced by law.

Why complicate raising a balanced human being with the inherent whimsy of emotion? Especially one as mind-altering as romantic love...

So, what's the best way to find a partner candidate? Maybe I can rent a billboard. Or make a website called halfonababy.com. People can submit their photos and a little profile of themselves and what they are offering the new kid. What do I bring to the table? Introspection, unconditional love, ability to get things done, fun as hell and a fierceness only a mother could provide. The agreement would have to cover two kids, though. I totally believe in having a spare in case something happens to the first one (note the earthquake in China, and I'm getting too old to do-over).

I sort of feel better about the plan. Now I need to drill it into my head and the notion of being in love with an adult male person completely out the other side. Like, seriously.